I know, I probably dish these things out more annually than I menstruate, but it hit me a couple hours ago that I probably should have done one sooner on account of my replacement iPod. So, suck it up. And do one too.

Songs:

Opening Credits:
'Jumpin' Jack Flash' - The Rolling Stones
(It was only after filming the kick-ass, budget-busting opening musical number to this song when the director was informed that this movie is not, in fact, about Jumpin' Jack, but some hermit girl named Sydney. So the scene was ultimately cut from the film, and cost us the Oscar for Best Picture. It can be seen on the DVD.)

Waking Up:
'And All That Jazz' - Chicago
(Instead, what we wound up with was a complete recreation of the scene from Chicago, with me in Catherine Zeta-Jones's place. Needless to say, reception was less than satisfactory).

First Day at School:
'family values' - the missing:
(There's nothing like getting in based on a legacy to make everyone hate you)

Falling in Love:
'Boys On The Radio' - Hole
(God yes, those guys and their music...yum...this is SO me)

Fight Song:
'Cruel Intentions' - Wicked Wisdom
(Well, these things never begin with GOOD ones. *Cracks her knuckles*)

Breaking Up:
'My Body is a Cage' - Arcade Fire
(...GOD this makes me feel ugly)

Prom:
'Make You Believe' - Jessicka & Messy
(You'd best start believing in corsages Miss Turner; yer in one!)

Life's Ok:
'Candyman' - Christina Aguilera
(So does this mean I'm smothering my pain with junk food or drugs? Either way, I'm anticipating an intervention)

Mental Breakdown:
'Cats Cradle' - Humanwine
(THEY SAY THE SKY WILL COME DOWN IN FLAMES...BUT IT'S ALWAYS BEEN BUUUUURRNIIINNGGG...)

Driving:
'The Runner' - Rory Merritt Stitt
(...um, Mr. Krader? You can get blood and Nikes out of your windows, right...?

Flashback:
'Black Spring Rising' - Queenadreena
(I don't think this memory really happened; maybe I watched a family member eat roadkill or something)

Getting back Together:
'Floyd the Barber' - Nirvana
(Hello lover; this is my good friend Floyd. If you don't get your hands off that anorexic tanning bed addict and get over here this minute, he's going Sweeney Todd on your ass. Kapeesh?)

Wedding:
'enny' - Idina Menzel
(Okay, so we're on a budget here and my wedding dress used to be a bedsheet. It's the thought that counts)

Birth of A Child:
'Like Wow!' - Leslie Carter
(I'm like, totally stoked! An infant!)

Final Battle:
'This is Halloween' - Danny Elfman
(So get your fucking Christmas decorations out of the store! *Sets the singing Santas on fire* Wait your goddamn turn!)

Death Scene:
'umpkinhead' - Self
(COOOOL, I'm gonna get killed by the Headless Horseman! Ichabod Crane, eat your heart out!)

Funeral Song:
'Rats' - Rasputina
(Funeral? What funeral? As far as the world's concerned, I'm food for vermin)

End Credits:
'One Step Closer' - Linkin Park
(Probably how the people in the audience feel about this film)

After Credit Twist:
'Farther Away' - Evanescence (And this just means everyone went home before the twist ever happened)